I ventured to the mall today with all 3 princesses in tow. Hubby was working and I was sick and tired of being stuck in the house, so I thought, why not? Before heading out we did the usual routine: First we changed out of the mismatched shorts and tees from our "crap clothes" drawer and into something better suited to "going out" (which, if you know me, you know our "going out" clothes hang from wooden hangers in the closet and are reserved for, well, going out. Today's choice: Matilda Jane. Seriously, if you have a princess at home, you MUST indulge.). Secondly, hair was combed and fastened in twists and pony tails and whatnot. And finally, princess #1 and #2 sat on the couch and listened to me give my speech about turning on listening ears and obeying and the promise of fresh store-bought cookies and pretzels if the above two expectations were met. And with that, we headed out to the van, with a freshly changed princess #3, stocked diaperbag and 2 stuffed animals.
The outing started out well. We made our first stop at the Apple store to play on the kids computers. We met up with hubby while he was on his lunch break and toured the Disney store (which we miraculously made out of alive without purchasing a single Princess-laden item!). After hubby returned to work, I decided it was time to reward the Princesses (and myself) by stopping off at Mrs. Fields for cookies. Against my better judgment, I allowed Princess #1 and #2 to get the M&M sugar cookie with the huge HOT PINK icing princess crown. 10 minutes later Princess #1 had finished her cookie and Princess #2 had quite (UN)appetizingly licked the entire crown off her cookie leaving a soggy mess. Yum. With the soggy leftovers deposited in the trash, the Princesses and I continued on to Gymboree where I labored for way too long over whether or not it was necessary to purchase all 3 Princesses something just so they could match (the Gymboree vortex I tell you), and instead settled on a single romper for Princess #3 that was half paid for by a store credit and coupon. So far, so good.
At this point, a nagging feeling began to pound in my sub-conscious. There was something I was forgetting. But of course, this is not at all uncommon and usually is nothing serious. So, we continued on. This time to ride the elevator up to the second level where the food court was waiting for us. By this point it was near dinner time so we stopped off for Auntie Anne's pretzels (I SWEAR, I normally do make my children eat healthy meals... but sometimes I like to treat them too). Those were polished off in no time. By this point Princess #3 was beginning to get rather antsy in her stroller and was no longer interested in doing anything with the bites of pretzel I was giving her other than tossing them onto the mall floor. I took that as a cue that it was time to get moving.
As we're strolling along, I make a last minute decision to stop in The Gap (note to self: last minute stops are NEVER a good idea). There were a few things I had seen online that I wanted to check out in person and although it's never fun to shop for myself with all the kids along for the ride, I thought I'd just make a quick stop. HA! The Princesses were beginning to get a little rowdy.... most easily blamed on the sugar high from the cookies I let them eat. I instructed them to stand in front of a mirror to amuse themselves while I sifted through a rack of tank tops. And that's when IT happened. IT. The very thing that had been nagging me. The one thing that I SHOULD have thought of. Before we even left the house. Before I let the Princesses share a drink with me. Before I ignored the nagging feeling and walked into The Gap.
Pee. All down Princess #2's beautiful Matilda Jane leggings. Into her shoes. All over the pristine Gap wood floors. And we're not talking a *little* bit of pee. We're talking a PUDDLE. An "oh dear God make it stop" puddle. A "mommy hasn't made you sit on the potty to try to go for at least 3 hours" puddle. For a moment, I froze. I mean really, nothing can prepare you for a fiasco like this. In a matter of nano-seconds, Princess #1, who is beginning to develop self-consciousness, shrieked and covered her eyes and hid under a rack of clothing. Princess #3 thought it would be the prime opportunity to declare her dissatisfaction with being belted into the stroller and began to scream at the top of her lungs. And Princess #2, standing in a puddle of pee, began to well up with tears.
At some point, mommy-mode kicked in. I grabbed the nearest employee I saw and hissed to her that we had had an accident. Her eyes got huge as she surveyed the mess and left to get some supplies to clean it up. I stood there for what felt like an eternity while waiting for her to return, all the while saying to Princess #2, "This is not good. Why did you not tell me? This is not good!" The poor (no doubt childless) employee returned finally with an arsenal of paper towels, disinfectant and rubber gloves. At that point I REALLY was just ready for the floor to open up and swallow me. I stripped Princess #2 of her leggings (thankfully she had a skirt on as well - there's a reason behind layering people!) and shoes and stuffed them into a Gap bag. We somehow managed to get the mess cleaned up and I made a quick stop at Baby Gap and purchased a pair of flip flops and a package of clearanced panties in Princess #2's size and got her changed.
I have no idea how we made it out of the mall. It's all such a blur. One of those profound mommy moments when you realize how TRULY important it is to listen to those nagging feelings.... I KNEW there must have been a reason I came thisclose to buying the Princesses some panties at Gymboree earlier that day. I will say that this little outing has cured me of the need to go to the mall anytime soon. And I'm not sure I'll ever be able to walk into The Gap again... And you better believe I will never ever let Princess #2 walk out of the house without sitting on the potty first. Lessons learned.
oh my gosh, I am rolling here, I am sure it was so not funny at the time but I hope you can some day look back on it and laugh! Hugs girl!
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