A Vote of Confidence

Well, maybe I'm doing something right...  a few nights ago we headed out to Princess #1's ballet class.  Normally it's a very busy day and we usually arrive exhausted, flustered and a few minutes late.  Sometimes (most of the time) my husband is able to come with me which helps with the child wrangling, but every once in awhile he has to work and I have to haul all 3 by myself.  Then I have the fun job of occupying the younger two while #1 is in class.  This is no small feat.  The ballet studio is in a strip mall and the waiting area is very very small - only room for about 4 to 5 adults to sit comfortably.  In addition the waiting area is open to the main studio where usually a breakdancing class or private lesson is taking place.  The shiny, expansive dance floor proves to be too much temptation for my newest walker and I spend most of the hour trying to keep her off of it most days.  And to top it off, the 4 year old daughter of one of the dance instructors thinks she owns the place and has a serious problem with understanding the meaning of "personal space".  Perhaps my own hang-ups, but annoying nonetheless.

So, at the most recent class, husband and I were sitting in the waiting area, doing the usual child wrangling, personal space blocking and adult small talk with the other parents.  The father of a little girl in #1's class was talking to us about our family and asking the typical questions of someone who has just met us (it was his first time to accompany his wife to ballet): how many kids we have, how old, all girls, going to try for that boy, etc. etc. etc.  The topic turned to ages, and we were asked how old we were, which as of yet I haven't figured out a good way to get out of just answering honestly.  At our response my husband and I were both pronounced as "SO YOUNG" - which is good I guess.  At least they didn't look at us like we had one foot in the grave already.  As we were answering I jumped up to prevent Princess #3 from joining in on the private lesson in session on the main dance floor.  At that point the man's wife, who has been to every class and has seen my child wrangling on a weekly basis, made the comment that she was SO impressed with how I handled my kids.  Saying something about how at my age she didn't even HAVE kids yet and wasn't sure she would have been ready for them  (Let me point out right now that I'm not 17 or something ridiculous like that and many people my age DO successfully raise children, so I don't really consider myself to be an exception or anything.  But anyway, I digress...).  She continued on about how patient I was with them to which I mumbled some lame response about how she must have just caught me on a good day, blah blah blah.  But honestly, inside I thought to myself: did she REALLY just catch me on a good day, or am I really maybe just a better parent than I give myself credit for 95% of the time?  Oh I know I have my bad moments, more than I'd like to admit.  I lose my patience, I yell more than I'd like to, I don't engage in frivolous play as often as I should.  And yet, maybe, just maybe I AM doing something right...  I'm beginning to think that maybe I should be a little easier on myself.  Maybe it's time I start cutting myself some slack.

Fun in the Sun

My dear friend and fellow blogger, Beth, left today for a 2 week long vacation to Hawaii to celebrate her 10th wedding anniversary.  To say I'm jealous would be an understatement.  Besides a small weekend trip to Wichita, KS, USA on our first wedding anniversary (to a lovely B&B I might add that was nicely appointed and even came with a private hot tub, which was and continues to be the topic of many interesting memories... if you've never tried to go hot tubbing outside, in the snow, a week before Christmas, you should try it), my doting hubby and I have never truly "gotten away".  For many reasons, namely, 3.  There just never seems to be a good time.  I've had a nursling attached to me for the better part of the last 5 years.  Jobs are stingy with vacation time and the majority of it has to be reserved for the obligatory trips to see family over holidays.  Kids get sick or get over involved in activites and school.  Church events take up spare weekends.  Money never seems to stretch far enough to make it through the month without being tight, let alone socking away anything extra.  And so on and so forth.

And so that brings me to now.  We are a mere 1 year and 9 months away from celebrating our own 10th anniversary.  In a word (or two), this is daunting and amazing.  I know I've carried on before about how quickly time flies.  You see it in kids most easily.  But lately I've been reflecting back on my relationship with my husband, and to see how we've grown and changed and loved over the last 8.25 years is amazing.  In some areas I feel like I've been sucessful in being a loving and doting wife, and in other areas I've failed miserably.  I've been making an effort recently to not overlook the little things, the things that make our day-to-day life pleasant, easy, wonderful.  The things that are easy to forget in the grand scheme of things, but impossible to live without in the small, daily existence.  

Whether or not we are able to get away for some fun in the sun in another year or so, doesn't really matter I suppose.  Don't get me wrong, we NEED those times away.  And now that our child-bearing and infant caring days are coming to a close, we will hopefully be able to carve out more time for US.  But even if we don't, I know that ultimately it's what I do on a day to day basis that is going to make the difference in our marriage.  And while a lovely vacation can do wonders to restore the soul and rest the mind, it's not essential to a happy relationship.

I know that I'll still feel that stab of envy when I look at Beth's pictures of long sandy beaches, extravagant dinners and lazy relaxing.  And that's ok too.  I hope she's enjoying herself... and her husband.  They deserve it.  :)

Such an eventful day...

I forgot to blog about it!  Shocking, I know.

A week ago Monday, my sweet little Princess #3 turned one.  I'm really not certain how it happened as I'm POSITIVE that I stopped time at some point over the course of the last 12 months.  At least I prayed really really hard for time to stop.  I need it to stop because my memory is not so great.  And I'm afraid with the breakneck speed at which time is going, I'm going to forget all the beautiful, wonderful things that make my baby, my baby.  Her sweet breastmilk breath and her drunk, milky smiles.  Her peach fuzzy head that is just now beginning to turn out longer locks of dark hair.  The way when she stands and walks her little legs bow in a bit and she looks like a mini sumo wrestler getting ready to match.  Her tiny little rolls on her thighs, not too much, not too little.  Someday, when those return, she'll lament them.  Right now I love them.  Her babble of "mamamamama" when she wants me, and how she squeezes with all her little might and nuzzles her head in my neck when I pick her up.  I love how she makes me feel complete when I look at her, when she looks at me.  Such unconditional love.  Such sweet innocence.  Definitely worthy of stopping time for.

Spring Fever - literally

Sorry, I haven't been in the blogging mood lately.  The princesses are sick.... again.  I'm so over it.  Bring on Summer and no more germy bugs!

Spring fever has definitely hit (no pun intended) and we are making plans to get. stuff. done.  We've been in our home for 9 months now and so far have only painted one room.  I really loathe painting simply because of the time involved in the set up (taping) and clean up.  The actual act of painting itself is rather gratifying.  I painted the nursery basically by myself, including a horizontal stripe around the middle.  I'm pretty darn proud of that room.  I slaved away at meticulously measuring the stripe and marking and taping it.  Painted it a shade of pink only slightly darker than the pink that graced the rest of the walls.  It only took me a week - HA!  (hey, I was limited to nap time and after bedtime, I'm lucky I got it done as fast as I did!)  The painting projects next on our list should be quite as time consuming as Princess #3 will be the ONLY person in this home getting a stripe.  I got over that real fast.  lol

Our other project involves landscaping, which should be interesting since we know nothing about it.  When we bought our home it had the builder-generic landscaping out front:  small flower bed with 3 random bushes and lava rocks for added beauty (see me rolling my eyes here?).  I've spent the last 2 gorgeous days outside removing rocks from the beds.  And scattering numerous spiders and other bugs in the process.  Ick.  What exactly do we pay our pest control for?  I'm thinking I'm going to ask for gardening tools for Mother's Day.  My poor nails have seen better days.  I'll keep you updated on this progress.  Once we get the rocks out we'll be adding mulch but beyond that I'm pretty clueless.

So Help Me...

Can the potty training fairy come visit my house and teach my 3 year old to TELL ME when she needs to go?  I would be forever grateful.... because if I have to change a pair of wet panties and clean up another spot on my floor or sofa one more time I might just pull all my hair out.