Tuesday, August 17, 2010

The End of an Era

No Billy, curls don't make it cuter
There are a few things that babies can pull off that adults just can't.  Not that they don't try, but really, they shouldn't.

Pot Bellies, for one.  There is nothing more stinkin' adorable than a little nekkid babe running around the house with their little pot belly hanging out.  But please, I don't want to see anyone else try it.

Michelin Tire Rolls.  Nothing says "mama feeds me good" than a roly poly babe.  And oh how simply irresistible those rolls are.  It's like they're just crying out to be squeezed.  But on an adult, well, I'll let them squeeze their own rolls.

And finally, The Mullet.  I have no idea why the God of the universe could not have created hair growth patterns to NOT default to a mullet.  But unfortunately, at least for my babes, a baby mullet was unavoidable.  Growing slower on top than in the back resulted in all four of my princesses sporting the questionable look and for a time, it was acceptable.   Unlike it's adult counterpart which is not ever an OK hairstyle to attempt.  It's just not.  Even Billy Ray and John Stamos eventually got rid of theirs.

Princess #4 sporting the Billy Ray look
I'll never forget the first time I realized it wasn't cute anymore.  Princess #1 was about 18 months old and we had just taken her to Chuck E Cheese for the first time (this was before I realized what a God-forsaken place it really is) with a little friend of hers.  We had been letting her hair grow because, you know, little girls are supposed to have long hair.  The mullet wasn't even on my radar, and suddenly there it was, staring back at me from a picture of that night, like a beacon that was shining it's light on the glaring reality: THIS DOES NOT LOOK CUTE ANYMORE!

We remedied the situation immediately and cut Princess #1's hair into a little bob.  We later followed suit with the other princesses.   The timing was different for each one, depending on how quickly their hair grew.  But the fact remained that each one of them was stricken with The Mullet and at some point it became not cute.

And so, last night we ended an era.  The era of Baby Mullet Eradication.  It started in March, 2004 and was completed in August, 2010.  It wasn't easy (you try running after a moving target with a pair of scissors).  But it was necessary.  And now, thanks to the deft work of the hubs, Princess #4 is now mullet-less, and our work here is done.  Billy Ray would be proud.

The Mullet-less Bob



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